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Saturday, January 6, 2018

Making New Year Goals Without The Guilt



New Years inevitably start the resolutions/goals and "gottas". The year starts and I have so many huge goals and things I want to change. That ever present weight loss goal and the exercise more goal. Yep, every year I have a renewed sense of hope that this will be the year I have spectacular results. And then a month in, the defeat and guilt and shame set in and I start beating myself up. It's not a great feeling, yet I continue to do the exact same thing!

DETAIL THE GOAL
Instead of a sweeping statement, make the goal "bite sized". By that I mean be detailed in your goal that makes it easier to define and accomplish. For instance, "Workout more". Great goal but leads to failure because it's not defined. Here's how I would put this: Walk a mile three days a week. Go to Yoga class once a week. This goal is direct and concise making the goal not as overwhelming in its generality.

PLAN
I've learned over the years some hard truths. Namely, without a plan to execute that goal, the goal is dead in the water! It's so easy to write down the goals, hang them on the mirror to see every morning and then not DO anything different. That's where the detailed plan comes in that gives me the tools to accomplish that goal and to take baby steps. Make your plan as detailed or broad as you like; however, make them attainable. The detail the goal paragraph starts that idea and you can add the specific work you need to do in your plan to execute the goal. Make them enjoyable!

MARK YOUR CALENDAR
Write it down in your everyday calendar so that it's a part of your daily and weekly routine. Plan ahead and it will make it easier to do and you will feel a sense of accomplishment on a smaller scale, such as weekly!

REFUSE TO BEAT YOURSELF UP
Any habit worth breaking needs a habit worth doing! So you want to lose that stubborn weight, you have a plan, you've scheduled the ideas and are doing them daily/weekly. Then you have an off day or week, maybe an illness, family crisis or just plain exhaustion. This is where giving yourself loving support is most necessary. There's nobody harder on ourselves than ourselves!! Remember you are human and no one is perfect; gentle self care is necessary to get through a rough patch without throwing in the towel. Plan for self care and do it. It's not the end, it's a rest stop.

HAVING A SUPPORT GROUP
Having an accountability partner or group is an excellent way to achieve the goals you have set and shared with someone that supports you. We all hit roadblocks and need encouragement and a helping hand or ear when things get rough. It's good for you to know you aren't alone and are able to open up and share your feelings.USE the support group even when it's hard to admit you had the super buffet twice that week and fell off the weight loss momentum! It's ok, another new day starts and you will be able to start a new 24 hours!

NO BEATING YOURSELF UP ALLOWED
Oh yes, easier said than done! It has been proven through countless studies that the way you talk to yourself predetermines a lot of outcomes. Sometimes, that self talk is so automatic we don't think about it. Pay attention to how you talk, practice self encouragement. I've caught myself just reciting crap I have ingrained by habit and I am learning to stop the words and listen to myself. This one is a lot of practice makes perfect (well better!)

The anxiety and pressure of setting New Year resolutions/goals will be minimized by a positive, detailed goal, a plan of action, support and keeping your words and thoughts on the positive and GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK!!

Thank you so much for stopping by, may you have a joyous and productive 2018!
Blessings, Sherry

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